10 days without Babah...

Sudah beberapa hari di Kedah. Try to adjust my life back to normal. No matter how I tried, the sadness is still there. I feel terrible when people start to ask me..

"Macam mana dia pergi?"
"Sakit apa?" etc..

I have to explain over and over again and control my feelings.. kalau tak banjir! I try to smile as sweet as possible so that people won't see my sorrow. It is hard, I have to admit, but like people always said.. life goes on.
Since my children are sleeping over their Mak Tok's house, I feel a bit lonely. Only Salman is at home, itu pon bila malam... So, masa kat rumah, my mind was transporting me back to the days where Babah was still there. I remembered everything since I was a little kid.

Masa nak pi skola, Babah refused to turn on the radio..in fact dia biarkan aje radio tu off (ke keta kita takde radio ah?). It was his Peugeot 520 tak silap aku lah. Bila takde radio, he decided to be the radio. Lagu-lagu yang bermain di bibir.. hanyalah surah Al-Fatihah dan juga rangkaian ayat 3 Qul. Not only that, we had to recite along the translation of the surah too. Bila ada extra time, Babah will explain everything about the surah..

"Tau tak macam mana titian SiratulMustaqim tu?"
"Err..."
"Umpama sehelai rambut dibelah tujuh..kalau kita banyak amal ibadat, senang aje nak lalu titian tu..kalau banyak dosa, maka susah lah.. kalau tergelincir, terus masuk ke neraka!"
"Eee..."

When I was in primary school, of course the ustazah will explain everything and I proudly tell my friends..
"Eleh..aku tau dah.. Bapak aku cakap..kalau korang jahat, tergelincir, masuk neraka..haaaa. Bahaya..tajam titian tu..Kena semayang selalu..tak boleh tinggal.."

Bila time ustazah panggil untuk baca Al-Fatihah beserta dengan translation, kacang aje bagi aku.. hehe..

I remembered when the first time I got my driving license. He was sitting next to me as my co-pilot. He gave instructions and what-to-do list and not-to-do list. He became my co-pilot for nearly two months!
"Eh, apsal ketepi sangat kau bawak ni.. ingat bawak basikal ke?"
"Sat gi ketengah marah pulak.."
"Menjawab pulak..ketengah sikit.. kang terperanjat orang bawak basikal pulak"

"Bila kita nak bawak kereta mendaki bukit, kita kena berusaha dari bawah.."
"Macam mana pulak.."
"Kena tekan minyak dari bawah, jangan dah naik bukit baru nak tekan.. minyak habis cepat..nanti bunyi menderum aje..Babah tak mau..rosak kereta nanti.."

After I got married..
"Perkara pertama ko kena beli lepas kawin.. rumah..Aset penting.. sebab rumah ni nilai dia makin lama makin tinggi.. kalau kita tangguh-tangguh rugi!"
"Mahal la Bah.."
"Dok bayar sewa rumah tiap-tiap bulan, akhirnya tetap menjadi milik orang.. kita tambah sedikit saja, tetap jadi milik kita. Kena susah dulu, baru senang kemudian.."
With that, I bought my house when I was pregnant with my second child. We moved in after Naufal was one year old!

When I decided to buy a car..
"Oh, pakai kereta paling lama pun tujuh tahun aje, lepas tu mesti kereta ada banyak penyakit.. kena beli baru lah.. jangan nak sayang-sayang kereta sangat!"
During his time, he had Peugeot 520, then red Saga, followed by Proton Knight, Proton Wira and his last car Kia Rio.. I could still hear his words about his last car..
"Lepas ni Babah nak amek keta Bah.."
"Lepas ni Babah dah mati, buat apa nak beli kereta lain.."
"Pulakk.."
But still Babah got the chance to have a new car last year that was Nissan Sentra Sport. Tapi under nama Adik. He tried to drive, tapi terlanggar pulak tiang rumah.. Adik tencen bangat.. sabau ye.. huhu..

And when we were kids, Babah mandikan kitaorang, then beratur untuk sikat rambut. Cannot make other pattern...only sikat belah tengah aje with the hair oil. Bedak mesti penuh muka just like tepung komak! Sarapan is a must. Sapa tak makan siap... Mak masak sedap2 di awal pagi, and I too, jual the nasi lemak that Mak made! Sangat laku! Sampai kena tanya ngan cikgu disiplin..
"Sapa dalam kelas ni yang jual nasi lemak? Mengaku cepat!"
Sorang tak ngaku and tak berani kata sapa..aku wat kering aje.. TQ friends sebab kaber line..aku tau Mak aku masak memang mabeles..huhu

Oh, there are a lot of memories lingering over my head with Babah and Mak. Satu hari Mak cakap..
"Tu baru Babah takde.. nanti bila Mak takde..lagi la..Mak dah rasa.."
Mak..please don't say that! Sekarang ni pon tak menahan dah.. Uda sampaikan refuse to go out, just to make sure people won't ask anything!

Aku tau mati tu pasti, but then, it really hurts! I cried everytime when I think of Babah! Miss him deeply every single minute. Even masa pi makan kenduri, on the way, tetiba aje nangis.. huhu..macam citer P.Ramlee..asyik nangis la..nangis la... Hoh..aku ternangis lagi..

I really miss you Babah (T_T). Al-Fatihah!